Maybe If Sparkle Was Thin?

23 Aug

Some things don’t need to be remade.  Like your mom’s meatloaf, overalls and the macarena.  Just leave it back there in your childhood with that little extra baby fat you use to carry around.  It’s good to just reminisce about things not regurgitate them.

Prime example: “Sparkle”

The original “Sparkle” (1976) was horrible with the exception of the two numbers “Hooked on Your Love” and “Something He Can Feel” but growing up black we supported our own, which didn’t help much because it bombed at the box office and got horrid reviews. Why I ask, what would posses anyone to do a remake today?

Rumors of a “Sparkle” remake have been shopped around since 2000; first with Aaliyah, then Ashanti, then Raven-Symoné and now Jordan Sparks.

Cut to 2012 this movie is just as bad however not “now diet flavor” bad but “unsweetened” bad. Still the character Sister (Carmen Ejogo) steals the movie so obviously when she goes there goes the movie. Sparkle (Jordan Sparks) no one cares about, I to this day don’t know why she is the main character. I’ve seen asparagus make a better presence.

The Good:

The writer Mara Brock Akil was really conscious about the portrayal of African Americans by shying away from “Dreamgirls” premise.  Instead of girls from the projects they are from an effluent family, Sister don’t die (thank Skinny-Jesus) also, Silk (Mike Epps) and Levi (Omari Hardwick) aren’t in the drugs trade.

Of course the two numbers as in the original “Hooked on Your Love” and “Something He Can Feel” are still the bee knees.

Akil cleverly placed the “Him Something He Can Feel” performance as the opening number for Aretha Franklin being that she sung the Curtis Mayfield pinned hit back in 1976 for the original movie’s soundtrack.

They got rid of the fat fourth sister (not counting Sparkle.)

The Bad:

The film is still lackadaisical.

We are to believe that these girls had this big of a career all the while sneaking out of their mom’s house every night to do a show?

The wigs, Sparks’s performance and those lapse dance numbers. Poor Delores (Tika Sumpter) apparently was the only one that showed up for rehearsal.

My number one problem with this movie was Akil’s husband Salim Akil directing. He is bad at it and I don’t know why she doesn’t see that. I hated it on Girlfriends, The Game and Jumping the Broom. It’s always all over the place.

However, let’s get back to Carmen Ejogo! She’s British, beautiful and thin. The girl can sing and work a stage. She did a brilliant job in this film. She did it all; act, sing and cry with perfect nails. I’d be surprised if she’s not nominated for an Oscar. As for poor Whitney Houston as (Emma) she did what she was hired to do (use her death name to get us in the seats) and maybe Jordan should have gone on a diet beforehand.

My favorite performance of “Giving Him Something He Can Feel” will always be En Vogue’s 1992 version.

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