Fat or Fashion Critic?: Best/Worst Dressed Men Oscars 2014

3 Mar

I know what you’re saying, “FINALLY, someone care about the men of the Academy Awards 2014.” and you’re right I will always be here to give you a great yet ‘filling’ report of menswear no matter the locale (the runway, the streets or red carpet).

Being the fashion skinny savant I am I’ve composed my list of best, worst and almost dressed men of last night 86th Academy Awards Red Carpet.
Oscar 2014 Best Dress Men
Best Dressed:

Joseph Gordon-Levitt in Calvin Klein was the epitome of young Hollywood even though he’s 33 (almost an artifact by Hollywood standards). The magic of his look and why he’s at the top of my best dressed list is because his suit; it’s young, fashion forward and fits superbly. As well as, the textile of the suit is a great departure from the traditional and expected monkey suits worn by many men.

Kevin Spacey in Burberry was unexpected and refreshing. I expected to see this color and style suit worn by a young Hollywood crooner so for a mature man to pull this risky look off and still manage to make it look classic, dashing and refine is a win with me.

Chiwetel Ejiofor in a Rake tux with Christian Louboutin shoes brought the gentlemen back on the red carpet. The fit of Ejiofor’s suit was a winner for me even if he wasn’t. He had the perfect break in his slacks that gave his entire look a seamless finish. Not to mention his date was a smashing accessory (not too flashy nor under-dressed) complimenting his look from head to toe.

Michael B Jordan in a Givenchy tux and shoes, Piaget watch, Forevermark diamond earrings, and a collar from the Gentleman Collection by Dave Thomas for Jason Of Beverly Hills almost made my worst dressed list. Reason being, when I seaw this look come down the carpet I thought it was too much and borderline gaudy. Upon looking at photos I started to appreciate this look. The tux is tailored very well, the almost overbearing accouterments are in vogue and the fact that he is another young Hollywood-er displaying a new aesthetic of tuxes on the red carpet for men.

Jason Sudeikis in Prada scored the ultimate win by knocking up the beautiful Olivia Wilde and had another big score with his suit and foolproof coiffed hair. A splendid blend of dapper and scruff with a hint of goof. The guy cleans up swell.

Michael Strahan in a 3 piece oxblood tux with black trim (apparently no one knew who made it) maybe because he may not count as red carpet royalty being that he was there to host. However, being an ex-footballer with a large build it isn’t easy to clothe a frame like that as crowning. You can even tell he felt confident in the suit by his well practiced scowl and pursed lips also, I am a fan of colored tuxes. Only if it complements your complexion and appropriate for the venue.

Oscar 2014 Worst Dress Men

Worst Dressed:

Christian Bale in Dolce & Gabbana was a major disappointment. I always want him to be as sleek and sharp as his “Batman– Bruce Wayne” & “American Psycho– Patrick Bateman” characters. The suit was too big, frumpy and his hair was a mess, more than that I’m over the facial hair. Dolce & Gabbana suppose to make you look appetizing not like you’ve already ate.

Mathew McConaughey in a Dolce&Gabbana tuxedo, Christian Louboutin shoes, and Chopard watch was almost as uneasy and kooky as his acceptance speech. I never understand how this immaculately built man can never wear clothing well. I mean look at those pants he didn’t ever bother to go to one fitting, I hate that hue of jacket and I don’t like matchy matchy dates- this isn’t prom. But his hair was awesome. Man, even the shoes are awkward, like whose suit is this?!

Pharrell Williams in Lanvin doesn’t even need an explanation as to why this was purely awful.

Will Smith in Berluti with a Harry Winston watch is a prime example of why divorce was invented. Its a wife’s job especially when she hasn’t been in a move since before DVD’s to make sure her man looks his absolute best. I wanted to like this suit but when I found out it was Berluti a clothier known for it’s exquisite tailoring I became very disappointed in Jada because she could have took his suit to be altered. I mean it wasn’t like she was busy watching over kids. Oh yeah, I dislike the slippers and ascot, you’re not Huge Hefner Will.

Zack Efron in a Calvin Klein tuxedo, shirt, and tie, Johnson Murphy shoes, and a 1967 rose gold vintage Rolex from Wanna Buy a Watch? was very embarrassing. Poor gorgeous Zack in a too little suit. I think he may have a weight problem.

Kellan Lutz in a blazer, pants and shirt remarkably hideous that no one bothered to find out the designer. He was almost more dreadful than Pharrell but, no Pharrell was the worst! I’m convinced Lutz and Chris Hemsworth had a shift waiting tables at one of the after parties later that night, you know working actors.

Oscar 2014 Almost Dressed Men

Almost Dressed:

Bradley Cooper in Tom Ford with a Chopard watch had my attention briefly. Not amazing enough to make best dressed but not dismal to be worst, just deserves mentioning. He looks great.

Tyler Perry in Peak Label Tux, Martin Katz studs and cuff-links was pleasantly appealing except for the tightness around his crotch. The one button blazer was very big on the fall/winter 2014 menswear runway.

Ethan Hawke in custom made Dior may have inspired Dior Homme’s fall/winter 2013-14 collection with his 1997 film “Gattaca” but fell a bit short with the hemming of his pants and I hate things in front pockets of slacks. No matter, Hawk the 43 year old fellow Texan is still dreamy. Nice haircut btw.

Jack Huston in Dolce & Gabbana have a way of looking incredibly like old Hollywood on and off the screen. He didn’t make my best dressed list because my limit was six.

Leonardo DiCaprio in Armani and Jennifer Meyer cuff-links knows how to wear a suit undoubtedly. Can he at least get an Oscar for that?

Jared Leto in Saint Laurent with a Piaget watch and Neil Lane jewels almost made my worst dressed list. I would have preferred him to wear his hair slicked in a ponytail and I believe that the white blazer on black pants always look ill fitting on anyone however, he’s too gorgeous to totally cock the look up.

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4 Responses to “Fat or Fashion Critic?: Best/Worst Dressed Men Oscars 2014”

  1. Theodolph L. Mason March 3, 2014 at 4:50 pm #

    Wow! This is a great assessment…I especially love how detailed you were with the “Worst Dressed” category. I will say Will deserves at least “Almost Dressed” if not anything at all though. I get the look he was going for and think it’s quite refreshing to see a relaxed cut and styled suit on the red carpet. My only complaint is that he and Jada didn’t look like a complete pair.

  2. Manu March 4, 2014 at 8:33 am #

    Thanks. We were in need of something like this!

  3. weisandy March 4, 2014 at 4:22 pm #

    Jared Leto truly too gorgeous.

    http://www.andbythewei.com

  4. Michael Macalos March 5, 2014 at 9:42 am #

    Really enjoyed this post sweetie!! ♥ ♥

    New post on the blog 😀
    http://michaelmacalos.com

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